Reactivity 

I am reactive

More than I wish I was 

So being reactive is the stepping stone to discovering part of who I am.

I try to remember how fleeting thoughts are, as in the Wizard of Oz-‘People come and go so quickly here …’

or the wise saying

Good and Bad

Happy and Sad

All Things vanish

Like the imprint 

Of a Bird in the Sky

Faults, Kleshas

Just to see our faults and virtues is a small victory in our lives. Most lives are spent as rats on a treadmill, whether by circumstance or by succumbing to our emotions or Kleshas.

We must take the long view as a warrior training in the fundamentals-small steps before large.

Something Happens – Equanimity

Something happens and we break out of our old thought pattern, have a new thought!

We rejoice if it is something good and different, if our mind has moved on to something positive, beautiful, exciting.

We are sad if it causes us sorrow, pain or confusion.

These thoughts of ours, they never stop. They arise, are here for a while and then are gone.

If we can see them just as thoughts that come and go, we can have a little more peace or equanimity in this life.

my crazy,crazy mind 

In the past, I have ripped and run from myself, afraid to look into what seemed like a hopeless abyss.

I would surround myself with pleasant and good things ….and stay busy, not wanting to be overcome by my emotions.

In study, practice and simply living, I have more faith in myself,in the work I have done and continue to do.

Help comes and is found everywhere: in today’s balmy weather, in friendly conversation, in the squawking of a flock of gulls.

In remember, perhaps in ‘The Heart Treasure of the Enlightened Ones’ being reminded that the great teachers, deities and protectors are there in a ray of sunshine, a simple fresh breeze.

and I remember that I am in everything…and that I too am helping others with what I say and what I do….and I have no idea where my crazy, crazy mind began, nor where it has been since then….and I can relax with that.

Just as it says in the Lojong sayings ‘Examine the nature of unborn awareness’.

and

‘Rest in the nature of alaya,the essence’

  

Joy

I experience a tremendous release of joyous energy in my life when I make a good decision. 

For me it happens when I honestly face reality. (It can be very easy for me to try to deceive myself and take the lazy way out.)

Realizing the life I live now will be reflected deeply in my next life and lives beyond; encourages me to have courage, the courage to be my highest, best me.

I rejoice when I have done this!